Here's a post from the beginning of January, 2007, where I look back and see how far I've come -- it's really fun to look back to this post and realize how far I've come even AFTER that point!
So I've been having a few BFOs lately about Emotional Fittness and thought it would be cool to discuss it! Parelli is really a personal journey - getting a human to turn into a horse, and not the other way around like in most forms of "training". One of the goals for ourselves is this lofty idea of "Emotional Fitness." I always heard the words and understood it as something "good" but I'm just starting to GET it.
When I first started L1, I was really "raw". I had no emotional fitness at all and everything I did (wrong) was frustrating to me. I couldn't make mistakes - my horse couldn't do things wrong (i.e. different to what I had wanted) without me getting angry. I'd take out all my frustrations on my horse, feeling momentarily satisfied but leaving still upset and coming back the next day to find our relationship damaged. We'd make mistakes and I'd be stuck, unable to move on, unable to deal.
The other day, I asked for the circling game, a game I had not yet won, and Cloud did his usual dominating. He ended up crashing through the gate, breaking it. He's done this many times before and I've always been flustered and frustrated and then I'd quit. But this time was suddenly different. For one of the first times ever, I didn't get frustrated with him! I just acted like nothing had happened and worked on getting Cloud LB and SOFT again. I was still frustrated, but I was able to shut off my emotions and just deal with the task in front of me. The result was a preserved relationship. I left Cloud with me in a position of greater respect and the next day he couldn't wait to get near me! Obviously this is progress - now I make mistakes, but I know how to respond in a way that preserves our relationship. I'm hoping that the next step is knowing how to PREVENT problems - but I'm satisfied with this step for now.
It's true - if Cloud had done that during my early days I would have made horsemeat out of him. I would not be able to control myself and we would be in a HUGE mess. I might even have gotten rid of him. So this is a huge improvement from where we were - but looking back on it now I can think of several ways to have prevented the problem altogether - so that we didn't have to GO there. That's exactly where I knew I would be eventually - and it's so cool to know that I've finally made it!
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1 comment:
Hi thought I should pop over here and not jam up Mugwumps blog. You have some great insights and remind me alot of me as a young thing (long time ago now). But please be aware that Parelli is not the be all and end all. It can even be dangerous for some who think they are infact "savvy" when they are not. This is what Mugwump was saying about reading a horse.
I did a Parelli clinic in 1995, with the man himself... it is good in parts. It helped me with a crazt OTTB, he is now 19 and my avatar picture. I ride him bridless etc/Blah Blah.But PNHMS has seemed to balloon into a whole lot of stuff that essentially is not needed. Maturity will also help with emotional fitness. This comes with experience and is hard to teach. Again, Loneplainsmen, go back through your blog and through your own words assess yourself. I would be concerned that Cloud should run at you with his ears back, especially after all you have gone through. I am sorry if I offended you, but I call it as I see it.
Regards :)
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